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The Adverse Effect


May 11, 2021

"All my life I’ve been trying to figure out….when there’s no blueprint” 

- - Dr.Nino Rodriguez, Social Justice Educator, Activist, Community Organizer, Transformational Coach 

 

The Conversation: How Do I Heal Myself When I Don’t Know Where to Start? 

 

When we get a scar, there’s usually something we can get to fix it: Band-Aid, cast, or a call to the doctor. 

 

But how do you heal your life? 

 

In this raw and revealing podcast, Ken talks with Dr. Nino Rodriguez, a social justice educator, researcher, and community activist talk about this very important and life-altering question.  

 

They’ll discuss how they learned to create a blueprint for healing when there was no blueprint, the struggles they had along the way, and some easy steps you can take to begin answering the question “How do I heal my own life?”, no matter where you are in your life’s journey right now. 

 

Insights 

  • Figuring out your life in a complex world 
  • Finding your life’s work and your life mission 
  • Navigating masculinity in a socially unequal world 
  • The danger of not following your own blueprint for success 
  • Milestones & benchmarks...and how to figure out a life without a map 
  • Being vulnerable & emotionally intelligent 
  • The important role of self-love in communication 
  • Dealing with anger 
  • Being OK while you’re still learning to be OK….Why you don’t need to be perfect to heal 
  • Finding your life’s calling 
  • “Shit’s gonna happen: Using the right coping mechanism when life throws something unexpected 
  • Being angry with ourselves 
  • Black Men Heal and The Confess Project 

 

Takeaways of the Conversation 

  • Healing is not easy. It can be complicated, so let go of the “quick fix” idea 

 

  • You don’t need permission or validation to be who you are. Chasing someone else’s idea of who you should be is an “invisible prison”. 

 

  • How you love is how you communicate Understand how people around you (including you) express love and you will be able to communicate better 

 

The Homework:  

Dr. Nino talked about a lot of things in this conversation, from race to masculinity to social justice and communication.  

 

One of his biggest themes, however, was healing.  

 

He emphasized the point that healing is about understanding what you are healing from, what you are healing for, and what you are healing toward. 

 

So, for this homework, take a moment to think about your own healing 

 

All you need is 15 minutes, some inspirational music 

 

1. (5 minutes)  Healing From Be sure to be in a safe space (mentally, emotionally, and physically) first. Then pull out a piece of paper or type on a blank page in a word processor. Write down (no filter) the answer to what question “What went wrong in my life?” Limit yourself to 5 minutes 

 

2.. (5 minutes) Healing For  After you did the above, walk away from what you wrote (at least 30 minutes or more, if you need it)….then come back This time, turn on inspirational musi while you write a list of all of the people in your life who care about you...and that you care for. Limit yourself to 5 minutes and include yourself at the top of the list. 

 

3. (5 minutes) Healing Toward  Continue to listen to inspirational music. This time, start imagining that your life was better. Write down what that life looks like (no filter). 

 

Once you’re done with the above exercises, put two things on the calendar: 

(1) Gratitude  Find one way to show gratitude to a person you care about 

(2) Self-Care  Plan at least an hour where you can step our of your daily grind and just relax. It could be on a staycation, just playing music with no agenda, reading, a book, or actual vacation 

(3) Self-Build Plan at least another hour in your calendar where you dream...then take action on a part of that dream.. It could be as simple as researching a course you always wanted to take or speaking to someone in a new career field. It could also be starting an exercise routine that you never got around to. 

 

Once you're done this week, see if these exercises helped change your life in any way 

 

About Our Guest: 

Dr. Nino Rodriguez is a social justice educator, Chief Impact Officer of Excellence and Advancement Foundation, program director of the MUST (Mentoring Urban Students & Teens), community activist, speaker, and coach. 

 

You can find him at www.r3volutionino.com 

 

Social Media Channels 

Instagram 

 

Twitter 

 

LinkedIn  

 

#HealBlackManHeal 

 

Other Resources to Check Out 

Manhood in the Making: Cultural Concepts of Masculinity 

 

Soul the Movie on Disney + 

 

Hood Feminism: Notes from the Women That a Movement Forgot 

 

The Confess Project